Lupus and Relationships: Creating Strong Bonds on Your Journey

I heard someone say that the love of family and friends is the glue that holds your heart together. Sometimes living with lupus goes beyond just the medical journey. It's also a relational one too. When I was diagnosed with lupus it was a hard blow. I lost many friends that could not understand lupus. This quickly taught me that lupus would impact every facet of my life, including my relationships.

But I've also discovered that with effort, empathy, and clear communication, it's possible to maintain and even strengthen relationships. Here's how I've managed to keep my relationships strong while navigating the ups and downs of lupus.

The importance of communication

One of the most crucial elements in any relationship is communication. When you have lupus, this becomes even more important. I’ve found that being open about my condition helps my loved ones understand what I’m going through. At first, it was challenging to talk about my symptoms and the unpredictability of my flares. But honesty has been key.

I make it a point to update my friends and family about how I’m feeling. This way, they know when I might need extra support or when I’m up for social activities. It’s a balancing act, but regular check-ins prevent misunderstandings and those difficult feelings of isolation.

Setting boundaries

Living with lupus means I must set boundaries, and sometimes, that’s not easy. It’s hard to say no to social events or ask for modifications to plans that were put in place months earlier. However, I’ve learned that setting these boundaries is essential for my health.

I explain to my loved ones that while I cherish their company, there are times when I need to prioritize my health. Whether it's skipping a late-night gathering or needing to rest after a busy day, I make sure they understand that these decisions are about managing my condition, staying healthy and it’s not about them.

Finding support in unexpected places

Surprisingly, my lupus journey has led me to find support in unexpected places. Online communities and support groups have become a great help. Connecting with others who have lupus has given me a sense of togetherness and understanding that’s hard to find. These connections have also provided practical advice on managing symptoms and living better with lupus. If you haven’t already, I highly recommend joining a support group. Sharing your experiences with people who truly get it can be really comforting.

Keeping the romance alive

Let’s talk about maintaining a romantic relationship. While dealing with lupus it can surely be challenging. It requires communication, patience and understanding. My husband and I have had to navigate it all together. We've found that good communication and flexibility are most important.

We've learned to check in with each other. We often talk about our needs and expectations. Sometimes, that means rescheduling outings or opting for quieter, more relaxing activities. Every day we have begun to appreciate the small moments and gestures of love. Working together through our love languages is so important. And understanding that those simple small moments become comfort zones when energy levels are low.

Embracing the good days

Not every day is a struggle. I often have to consciously stop to see the glimmers. On the good days, I make an effort to try to get around my friends and family. We plan activities, have dinner, and create memories. These moments are precious and help reinforce the bonds we’ve built. Celebrating the good days together not only brings me joy but also helps keep me uplifted. It reminds me and my loved ones that lupus doesn’t define me or our relationships.

Practicing self-care together

Self-care is one of the most important parts of managing lupus. Interestingly, I’ve found that involving my loved ones in my self-care routines has strengthened our relationships. Whether it’s a yoga session, a healthy cooking class, or a mindfulness exercise, these activities promote a healthy lifestyle for everyone involved. By practicing self-care together, we create memories and experiences that form better bonds. It’s also a reminder that while I have lupus, I’m not alone in my journey.

Difficult challenges lead to opportunities

Living with lupus presents some difficult challenges. However, it also offers opportunities to deepen and strengthen relationships. Through honest communication, setting boundaries, finding support, keeping romance alive, embracing good days, and practicing self-care together, I’ve managed to maintain strong bonds with my loved ones.

In conclusion, remember, it’s a journey. There will be ups and downs. The ebbs and flows of it all can make keeping relationships hard. But with communication, effort and empathy, relationships can survive, grow and thrive. Lupus is part of my life, but it doesn’t define me or my relationships. Moreover, it shouldn’t be a barrier to forming and keeping relationships strong.

How do you keep your relationships strong as you deal with lupus? Drop your strategies in the comments.