Needing advice from those who have experienced it
Hello, my name is Brandi. I'm 41 years old and have had some sudden changes to my skin and several unexplained rashes in the past 3-4 years. I don't have a formal lupus diagnosis, but I have almost every single symptom of lupus. My dad does have a formal diagnosis and I take after my dad in a lot of ways. I don't like going to the doctor, as I'm sure no one does, but my dislike is more of a total avoidance. I had a son pass away during premature labor, and I developed severe panic and anxiety disorders. I also began to suffer from a mental disorder known as agoraphobia (not to share too much but I'm sure I'll receive questions as to if I have seen a Dr and, if not, why I haven't). So, to say that I have to be dying to go to a Dr is an understatement, because I probably wouldn't even go then (kidding). Anyway, I was hoping just to receive some input from those who have lupus, and experience(d)the related skin rashes. I have had several rashes on my hands, and a couple on my face (even progressing into sores in my mouth during my first one about 3.5 years ago). When I get it on my hands, it doesn't always present itself in exactly the same way, as you'll see in the photos. But it always itches and my hand always swell up badly. Because I'm at a higher predisposition for having lupus, because my father has it, and because I have so many other symptoms (constant fatigue, feet and hands swollen in the morning, unexplained weight loss, pain in my joints, the skin rashes, and most alarmingly, some signs that something isn't right in my urinary system... Maybe I'm producing too much of a protein.. I'm not sure but I don't really want to get into details about that particular symptom). I think that I should probably get tested, but I just want to get some opinions on whether or not these skin rashes are similar to those that lupus patients have experienced. From the research I've done, I think that it's possible they're a sign that I have lupus. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance to anyone who takes the time to read all of this and answer. I appreciate you! 
Hi,
(Brandi)!
First off, I am so truly for the loss of your son. That's the kind of loss you never 'get over', nor should you be expected to. And developing agoraphobia after a traumatic life event is not all that unusual. I have a friend with agoraphobia and I know how challenging it is for her (well, as much as I can know without actually being in her shoes). Of course, going to a doctor is the best course of action and it's a shame that doctors don't make house calls anymore. You *may* have some luck with a telehealth appointment, although many doctors still want to see a patient in person, especially when trying to diagnose serious health conditions or identify rashes. And, you still will need to probably go to a lab or doctor's office to get bloodwork done.
I cannot diagnose your rash, for your safety. But, I can say that your rash does look similar to other lupus rashes I have seen. Here's some basic information on Lupus rashes that you may have already seen, but I wanted to link it, just in case -- https://lupus.net/symptoms/rash. It sounds like you have done your research and are well aware that something is going on in your body that needs to be addressed. I do think contacting a doctor would be a good next step. And, eventually, you can maybe get that testing done. Just take the step you need to for today and I do hope any office you contact is respectful of your situation and willing to work with you, just like they would with any other person.
Whether you are dealing with Lupus or another condition, its good to find out exactly what's going on and find some treatment options.
I wish you good luck! I know it isn't easy, but you can do this!
Best, Erin, Team Member.
