Homeschooling My Child While Living With Lupus

My daughter is soon to be 6 years old and she is my only child. I still look at her in disbelief sometimes. I never in my wildest dreams believed that I’d have the privilege of becoming a mother after lupus nearly took away my own life and my unborn child’s.

It was extremely traumatic and something that will always stay with me. I spent many years mourning for the child I couldn’t have and for the prospect that my journey to motherhood would never happen.

Fast forward 13 years and things could not be more different.

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Starting school

We put our daughter into kindergarten at 3 years old and she never enjoyed it. She was so unhappy but everyone would tell me to persevere as she will ‘adjust’ in time. However this never happened.

I was extremely concerned when it came to her starting school as I knew how much she’d probably struggle, but she wanted to give it a go. To cut a long story short she hated it. She would be physically shaking when I went to collect her. She would be in tears and begging me not to send her back.

Worsening lupus

This broke my heart and was making my lupus worse. My instinct was telling me that I couldn’t let this continue any longer. She’s an incredibly sensitive little girl with a very kind heart and I didn’t want to break her spirit by forcing her into a place that was taking her zest for life away.

My partner and I talked about home-educating her and he was very pro-home-schooling. My only concern was my health and how I would cope with dealing with lupus but somehow my motherly instinct was telling me it will all be okay.

We took the decision and nearly a year later I can honestly say it’s been the best decision!

Endless learning

I’m not going to lie and pretend it’s easy because it isn’t. I have many days where it’s a struggle, although the upside is that we can go at our own pace and choose what we want to do that day. I don’t have to rush around to be at school drop off and pick up. Our day can begin when we want it to and the same goes for when we finish. It also gives me freedom with the appointments that I need to attend.

I’ve found that there’s a learning opportunity in most conversations and situations. My daughter is learning all of the time, 365 days a year. The freedom we have is amazing and I’ve found that each day is never the same.

She loves to bake so we often cook up a storm in the kitchen. We have a wonderful local library full of books and resources. We often go out in nature and explore the wildlife, flowers and trees. We have met a lovely circle of friends who are also fellow home-schoolers which gives my daughter amazing social opportunities. The list is endless when it comes to what she’s learning.

Homeschooling with lupus

We have some great apps and other resources on the internet plus YouTube which has many learning-based programmes to watch on the days when I can’t manage to do too much.

It does make me sad sometimes as she will often say ‘I feel sorry for you mummy because you have lupus but I understand’ She also asks if I will ever get better from it. I have to be honest and say not right now but I sure hope there is a cure out there one day in the future.

I think having a chronic illness coupled with having a miracle child that I never thought I’d have puts everything into perspective. For me, spending more time with my daughter and making sure she is happy is the most important thing to me.

In life, the sacrifices we make and the hard work we put in are worth the rewards!

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