A woman blushes in shame and hides her face with her hands as floating pairs of eyes judge and size her up.

Discrimination Against Appearances

Last updated: September 2022

The discrimination in the world is wild. You might have noticed through my articles that appearance has been an issue for me over the last few years. It has affected me mentally and prevented me from moving forward in life in certain circumstances. I am a well-educated woman that has the potential to blossom, but I feel as if my appearance has been a big issue with my self-confidence. I had someone close to me recently break my heart. Why and how, you might ask. I went to this person hoping they would reassure me and tell me I have been going insane and the world is not like that.

Hair loss or alopecia with lupus

Anybody who knows me knows that I suffer from alopecia and lupus. I know it might have been me, but I was not getting a job because of it. Yes, I dress professionally, but I do everything. Such as putting a wig and make-up on. Why? I came in and they hired me, but they don't accept me when I show up normally. What if they wanted me to stay the same way they hired me? I have had that experience numerous times with jobs. I get hired one way, and if I decided to do something for myself or myself, they felt it was an inconvenience for them.

Trouble getting hired with lupus

Yes, I have experienced this numerous times. So I started to think that maybe that was the reason I was not getting hired. My resume looked awesome. I even had an advisor help me with it. I did the interview, but I did not get the job. The interview process was awesome. They even went as far as to say it went well, but I did not get a callback.

What affects me the most is that they want to be culturally diversified. I can not tell if they judge a book by its cover when they walk through the door. So, I asked someone very close to me why it was that way. I was told something I really didn't want to hear. The person said, "Well, maybe you need to put a wig on. People are big on appearance; maybe no one would want to see that in their office. That's not just in America–it's everywhere."

My jaw dropped. Why would you think that the whole world has this perception in the workplace? I noticed a pattern with this person. Every time I would gain weight because of fluid retention, this person would tell me how fat I looked and that I needed to lose weight. My skin would be flared up, bleeding, and my skin would show as I had second to third-degree burns on my body. This person would still make me be out in public even though I begged that its too hot and it was time for me to come inside.

Cut off negative people

I started to feel like this person did this for my embarrassment because the reaction I received from society had me refusing to go outside for months to years, and it was not of because of my own. I felt like the person intentionally did that. No one should have to go through that. You tend to find ways to start to disconnect from those negative people. Because why would someone who cares for me tell me that stuff time after time? There were times I began to love my body and started to wear more revealing clothes, and this person would tear me down. All I am saying is do not let anyone change your perception of you. Please cut them off. They are not worth your time or energy.

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